Why Do I Even Bother?

Sometimes I ask myself why I even bother doing this, or anything on the internet. I never come up with a definitive answer, yet I keep going on. While I appreciate those who do actually engage with me, I find it a bit depressing that nobody beyond my regulars even bother. I have two or three friends who come to see what I am doing here, or even engage with me on other platforms. Sometimes I feel like having access to analytics is a blessing and a curse to see where your visitors are from and then to see the lack of traffic and engagement everyday.

So why am I here? Why do I bother? Do I crave attention so badly? Well, I like to share my drawings and, to a lesser degree these days, my collectibles. I’ve been cooling on my collectibles lately since I am tired of being surrounded by stuff and it almost feels like it owns me instead of the other way round. Feedback has always been important, even though I have a slight aversion to striking up conversations.

This is a different time with loss of loved ones, political, social, health, and employment issues hitting all at once (along with being surrounded by wildfires in my location). Times are tough, and they are trying to break us. Heck, I’ve broken a few times. So in the end, if I can share a piece of something that I’ve done and make somebody smile, or be inspired, then I guess that makes this all worth it. That’s why, and every now and then I need to remind myself of that.

As you have probably guessed this is me thinking out loud, formy own benefit. An internal dialog that I need to take to the external from time to time for a type of Self-Care. Almost as if I am journaling like a Stoic, relocating my center zero-point of secular Zen, and accepting my true nature and how I am a part of my environment like a secular Daoist.

If you read this far, thank you for being here and actually caring.

Cheers,

Darran

6 thoughts on “Why Do I Even Bother?

  1. I guess we do it (blog and social media interact) for ourselves and because we love it and can express the things we care for. That alone should be good reason, but it’s always a pleasure to get that interaction from others. Twice I’ve felt I’ve hit a brick wall with what I do, and I took a step back for a bit then came back refreshed. Thing is I love writing and reading blogs. As for Twitter (for example) I hardly interact there these days as I feel it’s no longer for me right now. I can cope with leaving that alone, but somehow not blogging.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well said. I really do feel like another one of those bricks in that wall on the social platforms after hitting it so many times. Would 100 likes solve that? 1000? 10,000? I’ll keep on sharing and enjoying what I do for its own sake.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. My reasons for starting a blog are entirely selfish — I do it because I enjoy it and as writing practice. I do check the stats and it is nice when I see some hits (and am puzzled by things such that my post on the Doom Patrol episode “Hair Patrol” gets looked at almost everyday) but I think I would keep writing without any. Like so many other things in life, I think you have a look inward and see how the effort and rewards balance for you and you alone.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.